Showing posts from 2012

Have you seen this yet?

My website! View it now!!

Hello Is Junnu There?

I finally got Juney on the phone. I spoke for 5 mins and he heard me babble for that much time. It's quite a big task to get him on the phone. Actually, that's the easy part; he likes mobile phones, but only for listening to music. To get him to actually listen to you talk, is the bigger challenge!

I applied a different strategy today, speaking to him like a grown up. I told him I'll be coming to Lucknow next month to take him back. And that I miss him because no one makes tea for me anymore. QED!

Pappa...I Miss You!

Pappa...I love you!

I took a train to office, collected a P2 Card and left for 3 different locations for shoot. Between lighting and waiting, my mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Pappa. My mind was playing re runs of "this day - three years back"...I couldn't help myself from being sad, so I started typing on my phone.

Today is the saddest day of my life. Three years back I lost a parent and learnt the meaning of a new emotion. An emotion I mistakenly associated only with my trivial break-ups (with my then boyfriend and now husband),  and fights with siblings. Something that fooled me for 29 years to teach me its true meaning ruthlessly - Grief.

Three years...of not seeing Pappa and not hearing his voice.
How unimaginable this seemed on 10th of September three years back, when the news was first broken to me. Over these days and months and years, I have come to realize that, self healing is a wonderful thing. I can't say I've completely reconciled to Pappa's …

Up and Awake

Not Quite! I love these men!

Embryonic Sweet

I have a towel covering my head and face because I had oiled my hair. And at some point, Sumit clicked this photograph of June and me! And now its a favorite!

June, since he was a kid, has a sleep habit of digging his legs into the person next to him. To keep them warm. No one taught him this, its just his way to cozy up before slipping into sleep land.

My mind flips back to winter afternoons in Lucknow, when I see this picture.

I remember returning from school and cozying up to bhai like a little teddy bear, for a quick afternoon nap. I remember Mummy getting angry at me, for encouraging him to sleep in the afternoon, because that would mean he'd disturb her at night. Not sleeping at night, is something he still does...:)

Even now, after all these years, if i say "Bhaiyya mujhe ninni karao", he pats my face with his hand, like elders do to babies.

His patting is strong and painful, but the emotion is in the right place.


Will I be a petulant mom?

I lose my patience so often with June. I shout at him, I ignore his requests for play. I scold him and avoid him. Why do I get angry?

Agreed there's a lot on my plate with Mummy unwell. But will I be so easily irritable with my child when he's two. Or will I make allowances and bend backwards all the time?

I wish I had more strength and definitely more patience. Being a mother must be tough. Every time my period is delayed ( which is every month, because I STRESS A LOT as my Gynaec puts it) I get into a strange zone mentally.

Is this the right time, can i handle a kid? Can i bring up a child selflessly, will i wake up from my sleep to take her/him to the loo, will I cancel a trip to take care of my child? Embarrassingly, the answer to most questions is a blatant, brazen no.

So, what is this space that people need to fill with the presence of a child in their life?
May be with Bhai in my life that space is already full. I get my chance to molly-coddle someone, i get to bully and pol…

Rizwan and the Monkey

Written By Meera Jafri

We've had new neighbours move into the flat adjacent to ours. A young friendly girl with a pet dog are the new occupants of that apartment. 

One evening, our friendly neighbour came up to Sona and me and introduced herself and her dog Kabi, whom she claimed was a therapy dog. The concept of a therapy dog was new to us and we were curious to learn more. Apparently, Dogs are great stress busters and Kabi was used to playing with cancer patients at a centre. So she volunteered to send her pet over if she could help Rizwan as well!
We had several dogs as pets when the kids were younger. Rizwan had a special tacit relationship with each pet. He was shy of touching them but one could see there was a special bond between them. 
I remembered an incident from June's childhood. He was 7 0r 8 years old when this extremely shocking incident took place. My husband and I were not home and my mother was baby sitting Rizwan. 
Our kitchen was in one corner of the courtyard, w…

Play Time is Play Time!

We went to play Ball. June Chiggu Bhai and Me!

Playing Mummy

Mummy went to Mysore to attend Mysha's first birthday. And i got to play Choti Mummy to June.
Initially, both Mummy and I were apprehensive about June Bhai staying away from her for 5 days, but we managed well! This was the first time, I was babysitting him all by myself. Also, i couldn't have done it without Sumit, my husband's support.
First day went smooth, because June thought it was just one of his night outs at my house, and then the second day onwards, he was bored, sad, introspective and naughty to say the least. Over the years, June, has become very sensitive, he understands a lot more than he used to a few years back. So, i gather he made sense that mummy was not in town. Partly,  also because i kept telling him 'mummy ghummy karne gayi hain' (she's travelling, my nonsense talk that probably, only June understands!)
So, we were pleasantly surprised when June declined my elder brother's offer of returning with him to his home, and instead made his loya…

Mother's June,

(An Article written by our mother, Meera)

It was a happy day when I had my second baby boy.  Everything was so beautiful and new.  But, on the third day my baby fell ill with a stomach infection and started having motions. By the fifth day he was totally dehydrated. 
Then began the rush with high dose medicines. A cut was opened in his vein and drips were administered. We were all praying.  Seeing my three day old braced with medical paraphernalia made me anxious and nervous.
God heard our fervent prayers, Rizwan recuperated.  All seemed to go well till he was 7-8 months, but then we realized that he still could not balance his head.  From there commenced a saga of many trips to doctors and hospitals.  My June (Rizwan) was diagnosed with cerebral palsy. This came as a shock.  Honestly, we had never heard of it before.  After recovering from the initial shock began the reality of everyday life.  June was special, so every thing in our life became different.
I had five more children after …

Waking up

I keep telling myself I''ll write regularly, but in vain. I do actually have a lot to share with the world about Rizwan. But laziness and other things keep me away.
However, this post is just a collection of photographs of Rizwan, with me or mummy; groggy, half awake or just nonchalantly having his bottle of milk or green tea!
This post is a slice of our life with bhaiyya! All photos are taken on my bad quality phone camera, so please excuse the quality!

Riz in the Morning
He's a light sleeper.  Early riser.  Tea lover.  Sun - Chaser.  Has a great sense of time, and just as most other children like him, he knows his schedule better than us. 
So, he wakes up, lounges about for a bit in bed, then urges Mummy to prepare tea for him. Which means a bit of sweet smiles, kisses and hugs.
Then he gets out of bed, to lounge a bit more on the sofa in the living room. Collects his bottle of tea (drinks tea from a baby bottle, because he has weak finger dexterity,) and enjoys it.
And then whether, he's in his Lucknow home or his Mumbai apartment, He finds the Sun!

I shall sit here, serving tea to your friends;

I shall sit here, serving tea to your friends;, a photo by recent realisations on Flickr. "Perhaps you can write to me."
My self-possession flares up for a second;
This is as I had reckoned.

(lines, from Portrait of a Lady)
Apologies for the horrible water marks!

So I made a Self Portrait after ages! And I'm glad the way this one's come out. It's amazing, how one grows in any Art they do. What may have looked too bare in the past, may look too much just yet!

And, of course these are new clothes! They were bought off a sale from a fairly expensive store. The cheap thrills of wearing cheap-expensive clothes! If you know what i mean!
Please have a look at my etsy shop. I have photography listings at very affordable prices. Also introduced so some crochet stuff. I'm new to crochet and my latest additions would be amigurumi stuff!!

Here and also on the right hand of my blog, the link is given out.

Place your orders now!!!!! Some listings are on sale, so hurry!!